Subject: ENTER SANDMAN

Miracle Mile, CA: A spokesman for Kris "Jude" Lowe announced today that Ms. Lowe has entered into a definitive agreement with the Sandman. Although the specific terms of the agreement were not disclosed, sources close to both parties have indicated that this is the beginning of a new era of cooperation between Ms. Lowe and the Sandman.

"This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius!" proclaimed Coco Nice, public affairs director for Ms. Lowe's Southern California office. "Kristin has forsaken her evil ways and come to terms with the plainfact that sleep, for lack of a better word, is good, sleep works. Sleep clarifies and cuts through. Sleep is the muthagrabbin' bizz-omb, yo."

The spokeswoman for the Sandman expressed that the Sandman was "quite thrilled" with the prospects of cultivating a stronger, more productive relationship with all those that have forsaken the benefits of extended sleep. "That Ms. Lowe has taken the appropriate steps is wonderful news, but this is only the beginning," remarked an anonymous source deep within the Sandman organization.

Officials at Slumber In America, a Washington D.C. interest and lethargy advocacy group, reported that the purchase of a "Roanake Sleep Bitch" mattress was the cornerstone to pushing through the deal. Negociations had been ongoing for weeks since Ms. Lowe apparently "lounged like a motherfucker" on several high-end mattresses at a Los Angeles-area Sears Homelife.

Although Ms. Lowe was unavailable for comment, Mr. Nice expressed that he had lounged on the Roanoke S.B. and "it is fucking awesome. I feel as if this mattress will revolutionize the way that 'ho gets her sleep on. Noimsayin?"

There was no comment from either side on how this would affect Ms. Lowe's relationship with marginal R&B persona Keb Mo.